Crows For Dinner

The Wild Hunt for Inner Peace

Positivity ‘n’ shit…

It is almost 11:00 and I have only JUST now sat down for my morning cup of coffee. I like to come out here [we live on the edge of 40 acres] and do mini meditations where I’m so thankful where I’m at in my life. I’m thankful I have the chance to send my positive energies out and reap the return of the spectacular energies from the Earth. The energies are very strong out here in the middle of the woods. I’ve felt a surge of it myself since moving out here.

The first couple of days were pretty intense as I adjusted. In fact, they were so intense that I had several strange experiences as a result. I’m only assuming the latter but my gut is telling me I’m at least headed in the right direction.

It also tells me to love your surroundings. Not everyone can be out in the middle of the woods and connect with nature that way but you can do it anywhere! You can look out your window and up at the sky. If you are stuck in an office get a cheap decorative water fountain and connect to that! If none of these are possible you can look at your bed [or whatever keeps you warm at night, a structure that keeps your protected from the elements] and you can love that and definitely be thankful for that] Like, really be thankful. Look at it and thank it for being of service to you.

When I was in the middle of a “Dark Night of the Soul” [i will include information about DNotS at the end of the post] I lost an enormous piece of myself. Nothing had meaning anymore. If you want to talk about the definition of soul crushing … that was how I felt. I’ll go ahead and be honest and say that I truly wanted to die. I had lost faith in everything. I went to sleep at night hoping and praying that I wouldn’t wake up.

But one of the things that started to jog me from my bitter slumber was just being thankful for shit. Self talk is the most important talk and I AM BEING DEAD SERIOUS WHEN I SAY THAT. So if any of you are feeling like shit or you want your world to end because the pain is too unbearable, please, take ONE MOMENT to tell yourself…

“Thank you. Thank you for waking up today. Thank you for letting me hang on for this long. I’m obviously here for a reason.”

And then you tell your beautiful self…

“I am happy. I am happy. I am happy, damnit. I control my emotions and I am the embodiment of love, light, and happiness. I AM love, light, and happiness!”

Then, if you are of a spiritual nature you should cleanse yourself with some sage smoke [smudging for those who aren’t familiar] or if you have any selenite on hand take it from head to toe, on all sides and feet. That will clear your aura for these affirmations to really take hold and help you work your magic [so to speak].

If you happen to be a lost soul who has found themselves here for one reason or another; I know it sounds all airy-fairy [a nod to Eric Rankin] and woo-woo but who cares! No one has to see you do this and you don’t even have to say it outloud. Say it to yourself but mean it. 

This is a conversation with you and you only. Make it sacred. It is yours and no one elses.

I say this because I always felt a little dorky talking to myself. Especially in such a nice way. I was so used to hearing me talk shit about myself to myself that it felt strange to hear me say something nice. Keep fucking doing it and I promise you will feel a shift. A shift towards something full of love and within your reach. I mean, if I can go from being a heroin addicted, suicidal, sad person… every single fucking one of your has that potential.
1. Information by Eckhart Tolle on Dark Nights of the Soul:

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2. Information about how our self talk and thoughts DO effect us. This is a VERY interesting article about Dr. Masaru Emoto.

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Dominating Inner Demons & Why I Use Plant Medicines

I’m still making changes to the blog and enjoying a quiet Sunday with my love. So strange that spiritual awakenings make you happy to do the laundry and keep your house clean. Sure, it still sucks in the same way but because I used to own a house on the “dark side” that I appreciate being able to do my chores without wanting to die or gobble a bottle of pills to get through the day.

I still have my demons. I just made friends with them after I confronted their bitch asses, found out they were weak little bastards, and made them sit in time out while I moved on with my badass self.

May I suggest a little Pau D’Arco tea and some tater tots to help wind down after an afternoon of silly chores? Because that’s what I’m gonna do.

And smoke. Because I smoke pot. Yep, I’m drug free and have been for quite awhile. I don’t preach NA because I think self talk is the most important talk and telling myself and others that I’m an addict every single day of my life only reinforces it. So I stopped telling myself I was an addict and stopped letting other people who were just as sick as me tell me how to live my life.

And that’s how I came to use plant medicines like the universe intended.

Not saying Narcotics Anonymous and Alcoholics Anonymous aren’t helpful but… let’s look at the statistics here. It kind of doesn’t work [an estimated 5-10%] Besides, Bill Wilson, the founder of Alcoholics Anonymous wanted to incorporate psychedelics into the 12 steps so people could achieve the spiritual awakening the 12 steps are designed to do.

Here is an article explaining it further…

I also find it delightful that the founder of AA took LSD with Aldous Huxley. But I digress… so yeah, I’m not a fan of the 12 steps. It was only after I finally, after years of following everything NA/AA had to say, that I said “Fuck it!”, walked out those doors, and never looked back. It was only then when I finally began to heal.


First Post, Test Post…

This is my first blog post and it’s been several years since I kept and maintained a blog. But since I have been on this amazing spiritual journey I have felt the need to express myself through words more and more. The more I grow spiritually, the more I have to say.

I will be posting as much as I can and if you’re interested in seeing where this goes then by all means, pull up a seat, open your hearts and minds, and bask in all that the universe has to offer.

If you have found yourself here and are going through a rough time; maybe you feel life is kicking your ass? No worries, there is something here for everyone. I’ve seen some pretty dark things in my life so please know that you are not alone.

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